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Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Curled Up and Cry

it was in the tip of my tongue
i want to say it
i'm tired
i want to take a break
i don't wanna cry no more

maybe it's an exaggeration
maybe it's just what i'm feeling
but then why am i here?
feeling like i'm losing?
losing you?
losing what used to be so easy to hold

no guessing
no doubt
no waiting

i thought i already passed that
passed the time where i'm sleeping while holding the phone
waiting for the one i hope the most
but here i am.
going back to square one.

do you know what i love the most about us?
about you?
it's how you made me feel so safe, so secure
there's no guessing, no pretending, no analyzing
i don't have to sleep holding the phone anymore
because you're always there

we are apart
i know that
it's not an easy part for the future
but i'm trying
i'm juggling everything, with you in my center
can you do the same?

i've been hurt before
i know all the signs
i recognize the tingling sensation
the urgent feeling to be convinced
the desperate hope to be awakened from the nightmare
and i'm feeling it all over again now

i thought you are my last
but now i don't know.
do you?
if you do, why does my tears won't stop?

i'm so tired
with me there are two ways
whether we all in, or we all out
i don't settle for any less
because i won't let you settle with me for any less too
you deserve the best as i deserve the best

so just tell me. 
is this a nightmare all over again, 
or is this a rough path in which we can overcome together?

but i can't do it alone.
because if you asked me,
right now i rather just curled up and cry.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

One hundred more years with you

aku bertemu kamu dengan cara yang tidak diduga.
kita bermula dari ketidaksengajaan yang brilian.
sebuah percakapan sederhana yang kemudian mengarahkan kita kepada sebuah janji.
janji untuk bersama.

kamu mendatangiku disaat aku sedang tertatih.
berpikir bahwa sendiri lebih baik daripada bersama tapi tak pasti.
dan kamu mengajariku bahwa ada yang lebih baik dari semua itu.

bersama kamu aku belajar bahagia.
belajar berbicara dan mengungkapkan semua.
membina kepercayaan dan memuji dengan hati.
menyayangi dalam kepastian.

kita masih belajar.
akan selalu ada kerikil dan kesedihan.
tapi dengan kamu, dengan aku, 
kita akan selalu menguat, seperti besi yang ditempa.

so just scooch yourself closer, dear.
and i will love you forever.

Happy 1 Year Anniversary,
my beloved best friend,
my excellent travelling partner,
my trusted secret sharer,
my lovely partner in life.
It's been a great happiness to spend the whole one year with you,
and i'm looking forward for a hundred more years with you