Life's Update

Hello!

It's been a very long time since I really, seriously writing a comprehensive story in this blog.
And today, at 00.52 AM, I don't t think I have sufficient time to write long post,
So I just want to update several things.

I know that maybe nobody ever read this blog again, since I've also abandoned it for a long time.
But for years, this blog is a witness to all big things that happen to me.
All the stupid infatuation and heartbreak. 
The first time I'm falling in love. First boyfriend.
Another heartbreak and realization that maybe love can not win over distance.
And the moment when I knew I've found the One. 
The one person who's willing to stand by me. 
Who fought his hardest even when we are separated by hundreds of miles and still love me the same, if not more :)

So, today I just want to share you some updates about all the good things (Alhamdulillah) that happen in my life so far.

1. I've graduated from Master degree of Adult Clinical Psychology in 2013. This is a dream that I've been hold on to since I was in 3rd year of Elementary School, and finally I can call myself a psychologist. I'm falling in love so much with this profession.
2. Agi and I are already in our 4th year and he makes me so happy. There are a lot of dramas and tears that was cause by conditions around us. But thankfully I have a strong and kind-hearted boyfriend who always told me that everything will be okay. And he was right. 
3. We both work REALLY hard to prove to everyone who doubted us, that we can make it. We become better when we're together and this last one year we pour all our heart, soul, sweat, and tears trying to make better lives for ourselves and gain approval from whomever disagree.
4. August 2015 we finally gather our families and start planning our marriage (yeay!). It's still a long way to go with lots of preparation to make, vendors to choose, and money to gather, but it feels like a fun journey, because I get to do it with one person who always makes everything feels better. 

So there you have it. I'm so thankful for everything that happen, because every little journey count. 

I really want to make posts about our wedding preparation, but I don't think I have enough time (nor the energy!) to write regularly in this blog. besides, we're hiring Wedding Organizer to organize the details, because we're so lazy and tired to handle all the micro details by ourselves haha.

See you later guys. May happiness, health, and prosperity surround us everywhere we go :)

Cheers!

Dreams.

I have two kinds of dreams.
First, the big dreams.
I want to be a succesfull clinical-slash-industrial and organizational psychologist, I want to be a writer and have my own best-seller novels, and I want to be rich enough so I can give enough money to the needy or adopt some unfortunate children and put them in the best school I know.
Those are my ambitious dreams.

Second, I have a more simple dreams. But in a way, this is more important than any other dreams I have.
I want to be a devoted wife and mother.

I want to be a career woman who still have time to, at least, always prepared my husband and kids breakfast.

I want to be a wife who's waiting on her husband at home, ready with the warm drink and hands to massage his tired muscles.

I want to be a wife who's never nag. Who always face the obstacles with smile and encouraging words. I want to be that strong.

I want to be a wife who's never fight with her husband in front of their children.

I want to be a wife who can always discuss problems and honored opinions from every family members.

I want to be a mother who always tugs their children at bed and kisses them every night.I want to be a mother who read her children bedtime stories, because I believe in the power of dreams and imaginations.

I want to be a mother who's not afraid to say 'I love you, kiddo' to every kid that she has, and make no one feels left behind or unwanted.

I want to be a mother who's not feel too proud about herself and able to say, 'I'm sorry. I was wrong. Just like you who still learn to be a child, I'm still learning to be a mother too' to her kids when she makes mistakes.

I want to be a mother who will always able to accept their children, no matter what they will become and whatever choices they have. I just hope that I will raise them good enough to make them know what's good for them.

I want to be a wife and a mother that her husband and kids feel safe and secure enough to trust. I want to be the first person they will come to when the feel sad or happy and wanna talk about it.

I want to be a mother who can keep up with her kids. To be a mother that understands her children's world and know when to give them space or to hold them tight.

And, I want to be a wife that my husband will be proud to have.
A mother whom her children will say, 'my mother is my strength'.

Vivid Dream of Us

last night I had a dream
A dream that was so real and so vivid
I thought it was reality and I finally go back to that time
the time where I usually walking down the road
with you beside me.

but then I woke up
and realized
that it was just a dream
although the dream felt like reality
and the true reality felt like a dream
because it felt so real.
it felt so right.
and I felt calm all over again just like I used to be
when we walking down the road

but the time had passed.
the time had passed for us long time ago
and I've found another bitter sweet of loves since you
although nothing ever the same

but it's okay.

because I don't regret what I lost.
Instead, I smile for what I had.
and I had a lot.

cheers!


(just another melancholic post for a melancholic state of mood).